Test Week – Clean Breaks & Sick Stomachs

I looked into the recycling box – cans of Sprite, Coke, pizzas, spicy chicken slices, ready meals and all the calories and chemicals that come with them. Opened up the fridge and there was a spring onion crawling around a drawer closer to re-incarnation than its edible condition and a clove of garlic that was thinking of rooting in the egg drawer.

The drink and cigarettes are gone. A small sentence but a huge and daunting decision. I’m sure everyone would agree. What about the social occasions I loved and enjoyed? The Sunday nights with the lads, the quick cigarette at the door on Saturday nights? Those few lovely pints while listening to good music and the banter? It sent a cold shiver down my spine and I will admit to shaking a little now as I write.

But something stunning happened Monday morning, day one of the Project War Machine, I woke up with money in my wallet. Usually one of the last things I remember from a Sunday night is the sound of coins escaping to all corners around the floor and the first thing to do on Monday is to collect them. But not this Monday, this Monday there were notes! A positive change it has to be said.

This first week has simply involved a few fitness tests to record my current fitness level, so I have a marker for future results. Simple. I had reassured myself during the days leading up to the tests not to expect much, but how far I had fallen was nothing short of devastating. Initially feeling highly motivated that I was starting, that was quickly replaced with a feeling of deep and unapologetic anger at the state I was in now. They say the numbers don’t lie and in this case they were as brutally honest as many an ex after a few Bacardi’s! I was ridiculously out of shape, no better exemplified than my inability to complete a two minute burpee challenge due to the feeling that my stomach was going to knock my teeth out.

Iain encouraged and rationalised, pointed to the strengths and positives but I knew in my own heart and soul that things were bad, and why wouldn’t they be? Did I think that just because I was skinny that all that that alcohol, cigarettes and bad food had miraculously dissipated into thin air! I was in serious trouble but I do love a fight and this was going to be one hell of one.

So, sitting on my couch writing this, I look into the first week of fitness program slightly wounded but deeply determined. Once I finish this I must go empty that recycling box and fill the fridge with some vegetables that still contain some primary colours. We’re on the way, let’s get going!

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