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News In Brief: Shannon, Sexism And Serious Amounts Of drugs

A whole hape of coke (image: Thejournal.ie)

A whole hape of coke (image: Thejournal.ie)

It’s been a grand aul week for the ploughing! Enda was there of course, making a show of himself at the annual championships – this year in Laois, but that wasn’t the only reason Irish farmers have been upset this week.

They’re not impressed with Rosanna Davison, daughter of a lady in red and Chris de Burgh, after she told readers of the Irish Independent’s Health and Living magazine that dairy products are bad for you. The Irish Creamery Milk Suppliers Association reacted accordingly calling her article “ill-advised and scientifically illiterate”. Zing! You can’t argue with science Rosanna, especially when you’re looking down the barrel of a big burger and a pint of milk! Mmm.

Another Rozanna in the news this week was Miss Purcell (she’s a model; she’s going with Bressie, trust us NIB hasn’t made her up). After starring in Newbridge Silverware’s new ad, the model and company have faced backlash for objectifying women. In the ONE complaint the Advertising Standards Authority received the advert was deemed to be “promoting women in a sexual way rather than promoting the jewellery”. Poor old Rozanna was only sitting there in her skimpies sticking her fingers in a cocktail, not that anyone noticed we were too busy looking at the silver cutlery, that was what the ad was for wasn’t it NIB can’t remember, we were a bit distracted.

Here lads, did ye ever see a tonne of cocaine? It’s massive, like a narcotic Giant’s Causeway, in blocks of class As. And they’ve found some in Cobh, 41 bales, recovered from a yacht off Cork’s coast. Maybe it’s just NIB but surely, when you’re a drug baron, delivering your deal in one massive shipment, probs isn’t the best idea. Yes, yes NIB knows, being a drug dealer in the first place isn’t the best idea either.

In Shannon there’s bound to be an influx of drugs now the airport has gone and won an Oscar. Jaysus now they’re going to go and get all big-headed just coz they’ve won an award. They’ll sniffing lines off jets in sparkly pants and falling out of hangers at 3am and putting their wheel prints in cement with shiny stars on (this analogy has got a bit weird hasn’t it). But it’s true, Shannon airport has won the aeronautic equivalent of the prestigious film award at the World Routes Awards It got the award for ‘best marketing of airports handling four million passengers or less’ in case you were wondering, beating others in Germany, Italy and China!

So there you go, another week of nonsense. Until next time . . .

 

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