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Posts Tagged ‘ Bertie Ahern ’

News In Brief: Healy-Rae’s Cross And Gerry’s Not Happy Either

Mmmm Michael-Healy-Rae (image: irishecho.com.au)

Mmmm Michael-Healy-Rae (image: irishecho.com.au)

This, was the week Gerry Adams used the word “bastards” and everyone went mental but he wasn’t the only one letting his mouth work before his brain had had a chance to turn on.

Gregory Campbell a DUP politician and “b**tard” really went to town when he decided to lay into the Irish Language, poor defenceless little thing that it is. “Curry my yoghurt can coca coalyer” he told the Northern Assembly, taking the piss out of the Irish phrase: “Go raibh maith agat, Ceann Comhairle” meaning “Thank you, Chairperson”. He couldn’t see the big deal though and also said any proposed Irish Language Act would be treated, by himself, as toilet paper. Charming. Anyone that didn’t get the joke he said, needed a humour bypass. NIB doesn’t know, maybe he thought he was saying something else entirely, like; A man walked into a bar …. Or maybe he was just pissed, you’d need a drink to face the Northern Assembly. Continue reading

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Review: Breaking Dad

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I was lucky enough to be one of the audience members for the opening night of Paul Howard’s latest play ‘Breaking Dad’. The Gaiety Theatre was filled with a buzz of expectation before the curtains went up and the stars of Irish film and theatre gathered to witness the funniest play that I have ever seen. It was laugh a minute stuff from the off and it really is a testament to the writing ability of Howard. This is the third play following, ‘The last days of the Celtic Tiger’ and ‘Between Foxrock and a hard place’. The story is set in the year 2022, Ireland is on the verge of another economic boom and Charles O’Carroll Kelly has somehow managed to orchestrate the greatest political comeback of all times with Bertie Ahern being on the brink of becoming Taoiseach again at the age of seventy one. Ross, now in his forties hasn’t changed a bit, his son Ronan is now a professional soccer player with Celtic, his daughter Honor is still a pain and his wife Sorcha is still trying to save the world. Don’t worry if you haven’t read any of the fourteen best selling novels or Howard’s column in The Irish Times as this play is a very capable stand alone story. My wife attended the play with me and is somewhat of a Ross virgin, I know those two words don’t sit easy together, and there was no need for any background explanations. A combination of great writing and comic timing from the cast provide a tight production that had the audience laughing from start to finish. When it finished and I finally had a chance to take a much needed breath, the standing ovation that followed was much deserved. Continue reading

Paul Howard Reveals Ross O’Carroll Kelly Legacy To Live On

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“The year is 2022. Ireland is in the midst of an unexpected economic boom. The country’s debts have been repaid in full, the people are once again selling houses to each other for five times what they’re worth and Bertie Ahern is set to become Taoiseach again at the age of 71. Ross O’Carroll-Kelly is entering his middle years without a care in the world. He’s got a son who’s a professional footballer, a career-minded wife who’s about to land the job of her dreams – and, like good Cognac, his looks just keep improving with age. For Ireland’s most eligible married man, life is good. Until his teenage daughter arrives home from Wesley one night with the captain of the Blackrock College rugby team – and Ross is forced to face up to the lesson that you must reap what you have sown”. Continue reading

News in Brief- Cork Ice Cream Men Brawl As President Visits UK

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Two ice cream men have themselves whipped up into a frenzy as both face charges for assault. Frederick Williams (31), of Gurranabraher, Cork and Alan O’Halloran (29), from Churchfield, Cork have begun a turf war over the best ice cream spots in the second city after things got a little out of hand. An altercation became violent and, it has been claimed, one of the men reached into the other’s van and ‘pulled his ice cream lever’. (Please insert your own appropriate ice cream pun).

Did you know?! RTE spends over €1,000 a day on hair and make-up and that’s not just on the upkeep of Brian Dobson’s coiffure! In figures revealed by The Sun, RTE haven’t been holding back when it comes to making sure their stars look radiant, glowing and like they’ve spent the last 20 minutes in a very hot oven. That’s not all though €18,682 went on food and drink for the Late Late green room in one year. That’s not just any backstage food, that’s M&S backstage food. Continue reading

News in Brief – Top College Unveils “Sex Toy” Sculpture

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Apparently we’re all €100,000 better off, on paper (NIB is actually €3 gazillion better off on this if you print off this bit of paper), due to the rise in property prices. It’s all fictional, like the figures banks trade in every day, which in reality is made up of much more meagre funds, and they’re ours. But anyway, it’s good news!

A man has been banned from every pub in Dublin, after being picked up by Gardai for being drunk and disorderly. This story is not to be confused with the Bertie bashing last week, when former Taoiseach Ahern was given a whack round the earlobes by another punter with a crutch. Although perhaps banning Bertie from every pub in Dublin would prevent similar problems in the future. Just an idea. Continue reading

Tweets Of The Week

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With Twitter becoming an ever growing way of life for online users it can be difficult to keep up with all the big tweets of the week when some stories simply take over the net for a couple of days such as the recent #SlaneGirl scandal. Here at Irish News Review we aim to bring you the best tweets of the week from a wide range of sectors in our new weekly segment. Here are our selections of interest from the past seven days: Continue reading

Dáil Mourns Tuck Shop Loss

File:Leinster House, Dublin, October 2010 (03).JPG

TD’s and other visitors to Dáil Éireann will now have to stop elsewhere on their way into work to indulge their sweet tooth. Following the latest reports which indicate that Ireland is back in recession, Leinster House is also feeling the squeeze as ‘An Siopa’, the Oireachtas tuck shop, is set to close tomorrow.

The glass structure, located just inside the main gates of Leinster House off Kildare Street, cost around €1.3 million to construct under the reign of Bertie Ahern, €500,000 over budget. The shop was run by Rehab Enterprises as part of its SMILES Newsagents chain, with other locations including RTÉ, Vodafone Headquarters and the AIB Bank Centre.

Continue reading

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