Posts Tagged ‘ Horse meat ’

News in Brief-Astronaut Set For Late Late Bono Date?

CHIs anyone else starting to find Canadian “celebrity astronaut” Commander Chris Hadfield a little bit annoying? What with his tweeting and singing and constant picture taking of our Emerald Isle. Does he not have space work to be doing rather than instagramming himself in green bow ties and covering Van Morrison tracks with The Chieftains? When he comes back down you can guarantee he’ll be sitting next to Tubridy on the Late Late, buddying up with Bono NIB would bet. Chuh.

In the last year up till the end of January potato prices have risen by 187 per cent. One-hundred and eighty-seven per cent. Jesus. Did anyone know about this? Why wasn’t News in Brief told? Surely this will have major implications on the unsuspecting root veg that forms a large part of our daily diets. Forget cash for gold, cash for crisps is more like it. Comfortingly prices of pigs and calves have remained pretty static – what with the run on horse meat.

Spuds may be up but RTE’s taxi bill is down. The national broadcaster has been doing their bit by reducing their average taxi costs by 12 per cent, not quite a sack of spuds but every little helps. Still their total bill for the year came to €269,298, not the €360,700 initially reported by The Independent (incorrectly supplied by RTE ’in good faith’ whatever that means). Well spent. We wouldn’t want anyone getting their hair wet.

Perhaps it was a bit harsh to have a go at old Commander Hadfield, after all he has provided us with some lovely shots of Ireland from the air for less than a taxi from RTE and a bag of chips. All the bits of the country not covered in wind turbines that is. Those filthy, industrial, death bringing machines (NIB has found a new direction for our ire). That’s right, they’re killing us all. Killing might be a bit strong, but they’re bloody annoying. All right, not really annoying, but THEY EXIST. A group of families in North Cork really don’t like them and are launching a case against the company behind their local turbines, citing they are negatively impacting on their health as well as causing significant noise pollution. Similar cases are now being prepared for other sites, including Wexford and the potential site planned for the midlands is making everyone anxious. However Tim Cowhig, CEO of one of the developers, Element Power, said there is no scientific evidence to link wind turbines to ill health. It’s all just hot air.

Ouch that was a bad one. Anyway, moving on. In lovely celeb news Niall Horan’s (of the 1D) big brother is getting married, in secret, in six days. Greg Horan told the Herald on Thursday it was “crazy having to keep the date of your own wedding secret” with “just seven days” to go. Let’s hope someone points him in the right direction on the big day.

You can put lipstick on a pig but, oh no wait, you can’t anymore. Animal rights activists have recently won a landmark battle to prevent the testing of cosmetics on animals. Hurrah! But now what is NIB meant to do on a rainy afternoon?*

*NIB does not advocate putting lipstick on pigs, however covering chickens in body glitter . . .

News In Brief-Rat Plane Crashes In Dublin As Sports Team Go Off The Ball

Rats Safe After Airport Crash

Rats Safe After Airport Crash

If News in Brief can’t be bothered this week can we blame it on tooth ache like Rory McIlroy? Only joking News in Brief is always on the ball. Unlike the Newstalk sports pundits behind the ’Off The Ball’ team, they’re definitely off: the ball, the side and the airwaves. The group’s departure comes after the lads were not allowed the option of moving from 7pm to 6pm for fears listeners would not be receptive and incurring the wrath of George Hook. Despite the possibility of a swift swop to RTE any transfer deals haven’t been signed as yet and it’s getting closer to extra time (very proud of all those sport references). It’s a shame they left this week, there was some kind of ball game on Tuesday wasn’t there? Continue reading

News in Brief-Benedict Packs It In As Meteor Shower Strikes Russia

russiaWe’re all still talking about horses this week as it seems equine DNA is turning up in everything from lasagne to the Vatican where even the Pope has been taken off the shelf. Old Benedict has decided it’s time to stop tuning in to the big fella upstairs, he’s had enough of his rubbish horse meat jokes. Continue reading