Posts Tagged ‘ Jimmy Deenihan ’

News in Brief : National Hero At The Centre Of Langer Row

guiForgive NIB for thinking Arthur’s Day in all its Guinnessy glory was over for another year last Thursday. Seems we were wrong.

The celebrations haven’t stopped in Kildare. A statue of the man himself has been unveiled to celebrate the first thirty years of his life spent in Celbridge. Minister for Arts, Heritage and the Gaeltacht Jimmy Deenihan was at the event declaring the Diageo name, sorry Guinness name, was known around the world and he hoped the statue would encourage people to drink more Guinness, sorry, visit the town. Although it’s Leixlip that claims the birthplace of the actual black stuff as that is where the first brewery, owned by Diageo, sorry Arthur, was established.*

Apparently Health Minister, and NIB favourite, James Reilly, wants the country to be tobacco free by 2025. Or at least that’s what his smiling face on the advertising says. Behind the scenes it’s highly unlikely the government would outlaw one of the biggest revenue earners and key tool in keeping the masses in hand. More likely is Ireland will become tobacco free, but we’ll all be addicted to million euro gold cigarillos made of ground up unicorn horns. Continue reading

News in Brief-Dolphins Attack As Irish Rugby Players In Sex Storm

dolphinAfter the other week’s eel attack it seems the sea has unleashed a new beast. In Clare a dolphin called Dusty has got the hump with swimmers and has been bating the s*** out of them. The bottlenose local has been ramming residents of Doolin, even hospitalising some. The Irish Whale and Dolphin Group has warned swimmers that insist on swimming with her not to “grab, lunge or chase after her”. If you’ve been lunging at dolphins you probably deserve a shove.
Talking of slippery mammals, Irish rugby has been brought into disrepute by reports two top-level players engaged in a threesome with a woman in a Dublin hotel. Details apparently emerged from the woman’s Facebook account, before a conversation between the rugby players and their pals went viral containing explicit details. Before you ask NIB does not know who it was, but we will take your bets. Continue reading