Posts Tagged ‘ Labour ’

News In Brief: Rainy Day As Austerity Goes Away

It's coming lads! (image courtesy: rock.genius.com)

It’s coming lads! (image courtesy: rock.genius.com)

Time for another game of `Who Said What this Week?` And guess who features, again, Joan Burton, obviously.

So what was it this week that was getting Joan’s knickers all twisted? She was speaking out about the news that tech giants Facebook and Apple are now going to pay for female employees to have their eggs frozen saying, she was `not a fan`. Hang on, does NIB agree? Oh god, we never thought this would happen, agreeing with Joan Burton (although she wasn’t exactly rocking the boat), let’s move quickly on… Continue reading

News In Brief: Burton In Hot Water As Baby Theo Goes Worldwide

burton

Let it be known, this was the week in which NIB curled up into a ball and died inside.

Theo Horan (Niall’s 1-year-old nephew, in case you didn’t know) now has his own website in what can only be described as mind crushingly insane. Honestly, you know those auditionees off X-Factor that make you feel squirmy, this is like that except not only does NIB feel squirmy but also genuinely worried for Niall’s brother, father of Theo, Greg who seems to think he’s the sixth member of One Direction. Not only can you now visit the site, you can also sign up for a regular newsletter because the proud parents ‘just can’t believe how amazing our fans are’. “Our fans” Greg? Really?

Two fools tried to sell two tickets to a non-existent Kodaline gig for a fiver apiece, but were caught out when they tried to tout them to two members of the band. Ah the heady price of fame. To be fair NIB isn’t sure we’d recognise them on the street either, unable as we are, to commit a single one of their songs to memory.

In more musical news a petition has been mounted to get Joan Burton to apologise to heavy metal fans who she suggested would be far more troublesome than Garth Brooks fans, another example of the minister’s inability to see what’s going on in the real world, after Garth-gate caused protests and general outrage across the country.  So far over 357 outraged rockers have signed the petition to tar Metallica fans in particular, with a far nicer brush. Despite the trademark tattoos and body piercings they insist they wouldn’t harm a fly, a country music loving farmer from Roscommon though, that’s a different matter. Continue reading

Joan Burton Squares Off With Mary Lou McDonald

marylou

Heated debate took place this morning on Newstalk between two of the most prominent women in Irish politics. After tossing over the topical issues of the day the segment developed into a scrap on Sinn Fein’s legacy of association with Republican violence.

Burton criticised a lack of discussion and transparency on what she called recently at a Labour conference the ‘Sinn Fein – IRA nexus’. Some certainly may be tired of Burton’s approach, the usual refuge of Irish politicians who come under fire from Sinn Fein TD’s. Mary Lou retorted with a very articulate criticism of Eamon Gilmore’s alleged involvement with Official IRA groups. However there is no doubt that many Irish people are still troubled by the issue Burton discussed and it seems likely that Sinn Fein will have to distance itself further from association with the republican violence. Although the significant ground made by Sinn Fein was the main story of the recent elections, it should also be noted that many middle-leaning voters seem to have favoured the disgraced Fianna Fail party over Sinn Fein. This, in the face of the fact that we were voting against a government that has implemented several unpopular austerity budgets, tells us Sinn Fein have not yet moved into the political mainstream of Ireland. Continue reading

News In Brief: Kimye Land As Gilmore Takes Off

Kimye indulge in a bit of shopping on Grafton Street (Image: sugarscape.com)

Kimye indulge in a bit of shopping on Grafton Street (Image: sugarscape.com)

 

First they were here, then they were gone. The nation mourns the departure of ‘Kimye’, newlyweds Kim Kardashian and Kanye West, as much as we’re mourning the resignation of Eamon Gilmore as Labour Leader. NIB will let you come to your own conclusions about how much that is.

It’s true Joan’s going for the leadership role now. Great news all round. Entertainment channel E! in America were quick to jump on the bandwagon asking if she really had been spotted leaving a cinema in Portlaoise? Turns out it wasn’t her but ‘Kimye’. In case you missed it this is of course making reference to the world media being fooled by photo-shopped images of the famous couple and tweets suggesting they were just after getting themselves some breakfast rolls. Unfortunately the news about Joan isn’t a joke. Sure it may as well be her as anyone else for all the difference it’ll make. Continue reading

News in Brief – Bins, Ming and the Taoiseach’s Things

Ming Campainging for BOI to Keep our Fur!

Ming campaigning for BOI to Keep our Fur!

A 90-year-old woman is being pursued by debt collectors for a €14 bin fine. That’s right, while the world crumbles and Ming Flanagan seems our most viable option for Europe, Dublin City Council want their €14 back! The woman, who has not been named, lives alone in inner-city Dublin and became the subject of the debt collectors interest over an unpaid bill dating back to the privatisation of Dublin’s waste collection services. Four letters were sent threatening aggressive legal action and publication in Stubbs Gazette. Well done lads, what a lovely bunch you are, can NIB point you in the direction of a Mr Shatter who owes us €70k?

A painting by Michael Flatley tops the list of the Taoiseach’s most expensive gifts. The painting title ‘The Irish Potato Famine’ was created by Flatley daubing his feet in paint and dancing on a canvas (and you can tell) and has been valued at €5000. Other gifts include a golden replica of the Mecca Royal Hotel Clock Tower (Enda’s a bingo fan), a bust of JFK, a bottle of booze from the Queen and a boat. So that’s nice isn’t it? Good old Enda. NIB got three pairs of tights last Christmas . . . Continue reading

News in Brief – Shatter Resigns As Kenny Morphs Into Putin

shatter

Before we kick off can you all take a minute to imagine the theme to The Apprentice . . . got it? OK now we can start.

Alan Shatter has left the building. While the Indo asked ‘who trapped the rat in Leinster House?’ The answer became obvious, it was Enda and he was clutching him by his whiskery tail.

So Shatter has resigned and the future of the justice system is restored, well not exactly, but it’s bound to be a bit better right? RIGHT?! Former social worker Frances Fitzgerald has stepped up to the plate so hopefully she has a better idea of right and wrong. That’s beside the point though what NIB would like to draw everyone’s attention to is that Kenny has taken over Defence. Put a crown on him and call him Putin. Surely putting our dear leader in charge of the country’s defence policy is like appointing him leader of all things. Maybe NIB is exaggerating but you just wait, when the words ‘5-year-plans’ slip out you’ll know we warned you! Continue reading

Government Unveil Action Plan For Jobs 2014

Enda-Kenny

The Taoiseach, the Tánaiste and the Minister for Jobs, Enterprise and Innovation today published the Action Plan for Jobs 2014, the third annual instalment in the Government plan aimed at building a sustainable growing economy and creating jobs.

The Plan builds on the more than 500 measures already implemented through Action Plan for Jobs 2012 and 2013, and contains 385 actions to be implemented by all 16 Government Departments and 46 Agencies.  Building on the 2013 Plan three new Disruptive Reform topics have been targeted in the areas of Entrepreneurship, Winning Overseas and Manufacturing. Continue reading