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Posts Tagged ‘ Panto ’

News in Brief- Irish Emigrants Blamed For STD Influx In NZ

irishAlan Shatter is in trouble this week for apparently offending ‘old’ prostitutes. Honestly, the man has experienced anti-semitic hatred and cruel personal jibes recently and then he goes and calls prostitutes working in Ireland ‘old’. Actually, the story is not quite as clear-cut as tabloid headlines would have us believe, SHOCK and AWE. He wasn’t calling all prostitutes old, just some.

Our international reputation isn’t doing so well either after an article in the New York Times has caused uproar, depicting life in post-Tiger Ireland. According to the piece produced by Liz Alderman, there’s a man in Shankill in Dublin who shoots and BBQ’s pigeons to survive. The story has met widespread disapproval from locals and councillors of Shankill alike; Fine Gael TD Mary Mitchell O’Connor said she rejects the description of the town and the main subject of the article, who used to own boats and a five-bedroom house and now resorts to pigeon shooting on the street to survive. NIB isn’t sure, perhaps Shankill is the social equivalent of Mordor, I mean American’s don’t normally exaggerate do they? Continue reading

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News in Brief-Leave It Ouh Granny Joins Jedward In Panto

keep-calm-and-leave-it-ouhIf you’re reading this the world hasn’t ended – yet, anyway – and it’s nearly Christmas!

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer had a very shiny nose, and if you ever saw it, you would even say it glows. But actually “Rudolph’s nose is red because it is richly supplied with red blood cells, comprises a highly dense microcirculation, and is anatomically and physiologically adapted for reindeer to carry out their strenuous annual flying duties for Santa Claus.” This finding comes courtesy of a paper by physiologist Can Ince from Erasmus University in Rotterdam. “Using hand-held vital video microscopy used for imaging human nasal microcirculation in health, interventions and disease, we were able to solve an age-old mystery,” Prof Ince said.

Ten lords are leaping, nine ladies dancing, eight maids are milking, Eamon Gilmore’s swanning. According to Labour Senator John Whelan who accused his party leader Eamon Gilmore of being “out swanning around with Hilary Clinton” while he and other parliamentary colleagues were getting it in the neck from low-income working families. That’s going to be an awkward office Christmas party.

Grandma got run over by a reindeer but seven church goers in Limerick got clamped. A Parish Priest has given early Christmas presents to some of his parishioners after he bailed them out of their car clamping fines. The clamping occurred whilst the church goers were taking part in the annual carol concert in St Joseph’s Church, O’Connell Avenue, Limerick. After calling to the priest to express their concerns Fr Tom Mangan offered to pay the seven €100 fines.

Have yourself a merry little Christmas because with Bank of Ireland are to increasing their variable interest rate from 0.7% to 4% you’ll be paying it off till June. Enda Kenny said he “doesn’t like” the banks decision.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas when you see the first ad for panto. No less than the Dublin Bus Jedward panto, imaginatively titled, Jedward and the Magic Lamp. And this year another Grimes is joining the gang. Granny, Ann Grimes – sadly no relation, shot to viral fame after interrupting a fight in Dublin with shouts of “ah here leave it ouh”. Now she is set to reprise her role breaking up a brawl in the Magic Lamp taking her celebrity to the next level, or another level anyway. The price of fame, a Jedward panto?

Whether you’ll be seeing Jedward or not News in Brief wishes you all a merry Christmas. Off now to drink gin and eat enormous amounts of chocolate coins. See you after Christmas for a look back at the year.

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