Posts Tagged ‘ trees ’

News In Brief- Knowing Me, Knowing Who?

fatherted

Rebekah Brooks (former News of the World) has said this week she didn’t know phone hacking was illegal and that she couldn’t have that fella’s croissant and his new Lamborghini without asking either. She may have known what the celebs were getting up to on their nights off but she didn’t know she wasn’t meant to know. Ah. God love her.

Similarly Peter Robinson, up north, didn’t know the PSNI had sent a letter to a Republican “on-the-run” to tell him he wasn’t wanted anymore. Peter immediately called for a judicial review and issued a threat to resign, a threat that sank faster than Jesus’ pint after forty days in the desert. Not that Peter’s threat actually meant anything to anyone, except perhaps his wife. Continue reading

News in Brief- Giant Snowman Kidnapped From Wicklow As Cork Councillor Suggests Remedy For Doggy Dirt

snowyJust call him Leveson Walsh, old Louis’s fought press laws and he’s won. The X Factor judge has this week settled a €500,000 defamation action against News Group Newspapers in Ireland. This comes alongside the results of the Lord Justice Leveson inquiry into press standards in the UK. The full four volume work was published yesterday and could see the papers going quiet over the water. But not News in Brief. No, we shall continue un-rumbled by the regulators for a while at least.

It’s not even the 1st of December but Santa and his helpers are on red alert. Particularly in County Wicklow where Snowy, the imaginatively named, giant snowman has gone missing and up to five hundred Christmas trees have also been nabbed.

Growers are employing extra security and even installing CCTV to protect their pines. But for poor Snowy it was too little, too late. Last seen wearing a black hat and carrot nose, the sixty foot inflatable worth approximately €3000, went missing from his home above a shop on Fitzwilliam street in the town. Although there have been some reported sightings nothing has been confirmed.

Enda nearly had egg on his face yesterday as students protested against grants cuts at University College Dublin. The Taoiseach who was visiting the university to launch their new sports centre narrowly avoided the missiles. Members of Free Education for Everyone who were involved in orchestrating the demonstration accused Mr Kenny’s budget of targeting societies most vulnerable. A worthy cause, but who’ll stand up for cannon fodder, those poor innocent chickens?

Some say he can smell dogs mess from four miles away. Some say his family call him the Super Pooper Scooper. All we know is that a councillor in Cork wants to start DNA testing dogs mess in an effort to crack down on pavement foulers! Cllr Kevin O’Keeffe (FF) raised the issue at a recent council meeting after researching similar methods used in the US.

Apparently any accidents at Sellafield nuclear site would have no ill effects on Ireland according to a new report but News in Brief fears it may be too late. Earlier this week another two Jedwards, clones (all right if you’ve seen them that’s questionable) of the original two were unleashed on the world! A Jedquad if you will. It’s OK though the two new Grimes’ are only wax works at the National Wax Museum in Dublin. We hope.

And finally Newstalk radio posed an interesting question during the week. Do Protestants put the toaster in the press overnight? Answers on a postcard.

Space for rent. Cheap rates. Would suit professionals in the British media. Fully furnished with space for free speech, features and articles. No Independent regulators or politicians need apply.